Thoughts

THE TRUTH
Okay, everyone. Here's the truth. I'm bummed. Ever since Tuesday night's heartbreaking Lakers lost, I've been so down. I know sports is not supposed to do this is a person. But it has. So, the question remains: Can the Lakers come back to win this series? I hate to say this because it pains me to no end. And I'm sure Simon and Aaron are going to jump all over me for this one, but I think you can crown the Sacramento Kings the 2002 NBA Champs. Will I still cheer for the Lakers? You better believe I'll be yelling with all my heart. And if they do lose, I'll be okay ... Just give me a few days.

SHOES
Since I started working at the UCLA Medical Center, I've been fascinated at the shoes the doctors wear. They all have those slip-ons that look so comfortable and yet professional enough that patients will still respect them. In my meager attempt to look as cool as them, I bought myself some slip-on air-walks from Big 5 recently (which, of course, means they costed me about $25).
Anyway, so far, they have been extremely comfortable. But today, they almost got tainted. While I was walking with a patient out in the hallway, my nose suddenly picked up a smell ... a foul odor ... I knew the inevitable was about to happen, but there was nothing I could do because he took forever to get to that point and there was no way we'd make it to the toilet in time. So, plop! And plop again! Two huge piles. Luckily, they didn't land on me or him. My shoes were saved ... and he actually felt much better after walking and unloading.
Yeah, I know this is gross, but the whole event got me thinking about how beneficial good comfortable shoes are and how walking really helps keep all your bodily systems in check.

SUMMERTIME
Memorial Day officially kicks off summertime for me. So in addition to spending some time thinking about our veterans who gave their lives for our country (usually by watching the end of "Saving Private Ryan"), I make sure to listen to Will Smith's "Summertime." It's the perfect song to get me into the summer mood of hanging out under the sun, swimming, chillin', etc. And for Memorial Day, I did just that. I took an afternoon nap and hung out poolside.
I love summertime (and three-day weekends).

LAKERS LEFT ME GIDDY
I'm always worried about us CEFC guys not spending enough time together to build solid friendships that truly last and have meaning. One easy for us to bond was always to play basketball on Sunday afternoons and every holiday. Unfortunately, those times have changed. Today is Memorial Day and there was no mention of meeting up at church to play. Besides, I'd only be able to sit on the sidelines and cheer. But, like I was saying, the guys need bonding. And without actually playing basketball, we now resort to Plan B: Watching it - as in the Lakers during playoff time.
Yesterday, many of the guys were unavailable because of meetings and other commitments, but a handful of us ended up at Luong's place. Now, if you haven't been to one of these gatherings, you must know that all we do is yell and scream at the TV for almost three hours straight. We all stand up during intense moments. We yell and scream. We all move closer to the TV, as Aaron did repeatedly and kept preventing Steven from being able to see. We yell and scream. We eat. And, oh yeah, did I mention we yell and scream?
Yesterday's game was no different. After the Lakers were down by 24 points in the second quarter and the referrees not helping matters at all, we all started to lose our cool. Play some deeeeeefense!! Puhzeeseee! C'mon Kobe. Take it to the hole. Stop shooting the threes!!! But, as the Lakers always do, they give us all heart attacks and then start brining us back to life by cutting away at the deficit. And in the end, Robert Horry drilled a three-pointer at the buzzer to seal the victory. We all jumped up and hugged and slapped hands ... and laughed. And I mean laughed uncontrollably. It was almost funny how these boys do that to us everytime. I was downright giddy after the victory. All that laughing did wonders for our guy bonding. And today, as I read the newspaper articles about it, I'm still laughing. And I'll be laughing all the way to our three-peat championship because I think it's obvious now: We are the team of destiny.

CRAMMING FUN INTO ONE SATURDAY
Since this is one of those rare opportunities where I get all three days off for a long weekend, I decided I'd cram as much fun into this weekend as possible. Saturday was a good start.
Karena and I went with Ko and Charice to the Side Street Cafe in Newport Beach for omelettes. The prices were very reasonable and the food was plentiful and delicious. Then, we spent the days shopping at Fashion Island and at South Coast Plaza. It's always fun hanging out with them because we end up going into the higher-end stores. Good thing Karena didn't really see anything she wanted!
At night, I left Karena's place around 11 to meet up with my parents and Sandra and her boyfriend Gabe at Tea Station for some boba and to play some cards. It's always nice to have Sandra home because my parents are willing to do more adventurous things when she's here like go out at 11 pm and stay out past 1 am. We ended up drinking our respective drinks while playing a very intense game of Hearts. I can't remember the last time we had such good family fun time. Hmm ... maybe when I was about 10 and we spent one Saturday night playing board games. I was glad we got to get my parents out of the house to live like us 20-somethings at least for one night.

SOME THOUGHTS AND THE LAKERS
Last Thursday, I was listening to Dennis Prager and he was talking about the whole Chondra Levy/Gary Condit thing. He asked if the amount of media coverage of the case was too much and if we were happy with the time we spent reading about it. For example, are we happy with the amount of time we devoted to watching the O.J. murder trial? Probably not. It may have seemed important at the time, but as we look back years later, I really couldn't care less (even for the famed "If the glove does not fit, you must acquit!" line). So, taking that idea to a wider level, I think that's how we should all live our lives. As we devote our time to doing things, we should ask ourselves: "Am I going to be pleased five years later with the amount of time I'm spending on this thingnow? What a way to live! Theoretically, that would really cut down on wasted time.
But that got me thinking about how much time I devote to watching Laker games and reading about it in the newspaper. The LA Times has been devoting almost four full pages of coverage after a playoff game. And guess who reads every word of it? Am I happy spending so much time watching games, analyzing plays, memorizing stats, and reading all about it the next day? Yes. I love my team, even though they played without heart yesterday and got hammered. Tyrone came up to me last night and made sure I knew how much the Lakers suck. And yet, somehow, I still believe in this time. Somehow, this crazy team intrigues me. And even if they don't three-peat, I'm still going to be happy with the time I've invested in these guys.

WATCHING THE CLOCK AND THE CALENDAR
I've been really bummed this week because I was in a hurry Saturday night to get my stuff together to come back to my apartment. After spending all day Saturday driving to and from Vegas, I was pretty tired and just wanted to rush back to my apartment to get some sleep. And in my haste, I forgot to grab my watch. This really messes me up because I look at my watch about 200 times a day because I have to chart when I enter and exit a patient's room so I can document the length of the treatment time. Plus, I have to look at my watch to remember the date. And that's not even mentioning how often I end up checking my watch to count how long until I can leave! But all week, I've just been looking at my naked wrist and a frown comes on my face as I scramble to find a clock or look on my pager for the time. It sucks! And that's weird because I didn't really start wearing a watch reguarly until college. But before that, I never ever dreamed I'd wear a watch on a daily basis ... and like it.
In other news, I'm off work so I'm just kickin' it today. And after working nine of the last ten days (with the one day off being the very fun, but very exhausting Vegas trip), I could really use the rest. But there's hope for me on the calendar. Including today, I work only once in the next five days. Let me say that again: ONCE in the next FIVE days. Now how sweet is that? =)

SUZANNE'S BIRTHDAY
Last night, Karena and I had the pleasure of going to Tony Roma's in Alhambra to celebrate Suzanne's birthday. It's always fun for me to hang out with church people during the week. And this was no different. Luckily for me, I got to sit in the middle of the long table so I could socialize with almost everybody. I got to hear Jacob tell everybody how his boss got fired, see how Victoria eats her corn on the cob by chomping away in random places, and make fun of Aaron (my favorite pasttime). But sitting in the middle also put me next to Suzanne and that got me into a little mischief towards the end of the night. While everyone was eating birthday cake, I noticed Vanessa and Simon making a pile of frosting on a plate so they could do the pie in the face gag to Suzanne. When I figured out what they were up to, I relunctantly agreed. I held the plate in my hands for a long time just thinking about how I would do this. Slow and steady? Quick and painful? I opted for slow and steady. But it turned out to be too slow because she backed up and I ended up hitting the hard plate against her chin ... while getting NO cake on her at all. Of course, as payback, Luong tried twice to get the frosting on my face ... and succeeded once.

I'M LATE
While I was off dreaming and enjoying a very good sleep, I awoke and realized it seemed a little too bright for 6 am. I looked at my clock without my glasses. Hmmm ... 6:03. I guess it's not time for my alarm to go off yet. Wait, it's 8:03. I'm way late! I called into work to tell them I'd be late and the secretary jokingly said, "Um, yeah. I figured as much becuase you're already late!" I laughed. I didn't eat breakfast, didn't really comb my hair. Just threw on some clothes, brushed my teeth, and headed out the door. I hate waking up late. You feel unprofessional, lazy, and stupid. But I do feel well-rested!

But on a much sadder note, I had a patient pull out yet another feeding tube on my watch. That's three in the 6 weeks. Not good.

BAD HOUR
Still not fully recovered from the Vegas road-trip, I went to work again feeling a little sleepy. But so far, I haven't suffered any ill effects from it ... until today. I had a patient who was a very big guy (about my height, but probably about 60 pounds heavier than me) who had brain surgery and is still slightly confused. So after helping him get up into a chair, I left him there with his wife. But what I didn't know is that he needed to have both his hands restrained because he isn't fully aware of what he's doing yet. Well, he proceeded to pull out his feeding tube (which is a real pain to put in and even a bigger pain to replace once it's been pulled out). And to make matters worse, he also went "No. 2" all over the chair. The nurse was obviously very upset at me so I had to help her get him back to bed. I almost got slimed with the "No. 2" but managed to make it out of there unscathed. But it was nasty and I felt horrible afterward, even though I really don't think it was my fault. Well, good thing this bad streak only lasted for that hour because the afternoon went much smoother.
But I think the moral of the story is I have to go to bed early tonight.

SPONTANEOUS
Talk about spontaneous!!! Yesterday, I mentioned that Jason and his groomsmen were heading down to San Diego for a day of fun and guy bonding. Well, the plans changed very spontaneously and we decided right then and there to head toward Las Vegas for a one day road trip. Sure, that meant spending more time on the road (8+ hours) than in Vegas itself (about 5 hours), but it was well worth it.
While we were there, we put down some money on the Lakers/Kings game. We played it safe and put up $50 that the Kings would be winning at the half (since the Lakers have been playing poorly in the first half all playoffs long) and $40 that the Lakers would win the game. So, that obviously put us in a weird position because we were all cheering for the Kings in the first half: "Com'on Bibby. Get it together!" "Let's go Vlade. Shaq can't stop you!" It was uncomfortable, surreal, and very funny. But that was a bet I was happy to lose because the Lakers took control of the game early and never looked back. And for that I was happy.
The long drive made for a good time for us to get to know each other better and the buffet at Paris (although a bit pricy) had some of the best shrimp cocktail and smoked salmon I have ever had. I'm still thinking about it!
But of course, all good things must come to and end. And now I'm sitting here at work.
What a letdown.

BIG SATURDAY
I'm excited today. Not only is today the start of the Lakers/Kings series that's going to determine the eventual NBA champion this year, but I'm also going to San Diego for the day with Jason and his other groomsmen. This is one of those fun trips where we only know where we're going and when we'll be back. The rest of the time is going to be filled with spontaneous ideas. I love that!
The only problem?
It's sort of a "school night" since I have to be at work bright and early Sunday morning.

BACHELOR EATING
Even though I am in a very committed relationship, that still doesn't change the fact that I am a single guy living in my own apartment. And that, of course, leads to typical bachelor eating. For example, on Wednesday night, I cooked a dish for myself and Karena that I thought would be good. It was pasta with BBQ baked beans and corn over it. The meal itself probably cost about $2.50 to make, but I thought it was delicious. But Karena wasn't as impressed. I guess I still cook and eat as a typical bachelor.
But hey, at least it wasn't Hungry-Man Salisbury Steak!

THE BALL SQUEEZERS
About two weeks ago, my dad brought home about 5 of those small, squishy, squeezable balls that they often give out at job fairs and trade shows. They are called everything from stress relievers to play toys. Whatever you want to call them, my dad was very happy to bring home five that he had been given free of charge. They were all in the shape of a globe and advertising some hotel in San Francisco. Since my dad was so excited, I thought I'd go ahead and let him feel good about himself by telling him how nice they were. But I think I took it one step too far. I mistakenly told him that these would be good to give to some of my patients who have had strokes. They could use squeeze these balls and improve their grip strength.
Me and my big mouth!
When I came home the next weekend, I found a box FULL of those ball squeezers (probably about 125 of them in total). I was mortified. And so was my mother. "Now you've done it!" she said. So, I have no choice but to bring a ball a day and hand it to a patient who I think would benefit from it. And surprisingly, it has gone fairly well. Patients and families are happy they are getting something free and feel I'm going "the extra mile" for them. And my mom is happy because I'm slowly putting a dent in the number of balls in the box. She's already looking to throw the box away to keep our garage neat and tidy.
So if you feel your grip strenght is slipping, let me know and I'll give you a ball. Or two. Or three.

MEMORY LAPSES
I knew it wasn't going to be a good day memory-wise when I left my apartment is morning and forgot my lunch in the fridge. Sure, I could have just gone upstairs to buy some Taco Bell or to grab some nasty grub from the cafeteria, but I just decided not to eat. I don't need all those bad calories anyway.
But what made me sad was losing my gait belt. For those of you who don't know, a gait (meaning "walking") belt is used by all PTs who work in hospitals so we can hold onto our patients so they don't fall. I've sad countless people by holding them up and prevening them from falling down the stairs, tripping and landing onto the floor, etc. When I was doing an internship at Glendale Adventist, my clinical instructor bought me this very nice blue gait belt out of her own pocket. She thought I should have a better one than the cheapy PT school handout one I originally had. So, for the past 4 years, I've been using that belt to save people and to rehabilitate them back to full function.
Until today.
After working with a patient, I helped him back to bed and accidentally left the belt on him. About half an hour later, an ambulance came to transfer him to another hospital and he was gone. Right after he left, it donned upon me that I didn't have my belt. But it was too late.
This is like Luke Skywalker not having his light saber. Jackie Chan not having his kung-fu skills. Shaft not having his attitude.
Today, I am half the PT I once was. But I will re-group. Somehow.
I guess I'll have to fork over the $5 and get a new one.

LAKER LESSONS LEARNED
If there's one lesson I've learned over the course of the previous two back-to-back championship Laker seasons, it's this: Seek Ye first. We know that Matthew 6:33 says we should seek Him first and all these other things will be give to us as well. And that's exactly what we do when there are Lakers game on Friday nights or Sunday afternoons. During all the Friday night games (like last Friday), I have to pull myself away from the TV and drive myself to church. And once I'm there, that's it. I'm there to focus on worshipping God ... and not even thinking about the Lakers. So when Nathan pulled out his cell phone to check the score, I yelled out "No!" and didn't want to have anything to do with it because I wanted to keep my focus. But once small groups was over ... I ran right over to him and asked to see the score.
We had won.
And the same held true today as I spent the morning worshipping in His house without dwelling on Shaq's ailing ankles and toes or Kobe's suddenly awful free throw shooting or Tim Duncan's MVP statistics. And afterward, I nearly lost my voice screaming and hollering at the Wai's TV along with Simon, Aaron, Ricky, Luong, and Gary.
And we won.
Again.

MY THOUGHTS
Everyone knows the name of this page is "My Thoughts." Last night in our Men's small group, we came across a verse that I thought was very appropriate for my page. Here is that verse:

"We demolish arguments and ever pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."
-2Corinthians 10:5

TOO HOT
I am too hot. Way too hot. Especially while I'm working.
Now before you get all upset at me for making a conceited comment, let me explain.
I am always too warm. And when I'm at work, I sweat. And let me emphasize the word SWEAT!!! Picture Shaq during the 4th quarter of a grueling game, dripping huge droplets of sweat down his face and onto the floor. That's about half as sweat as I get while working with patients.
There's just something about doing PT that makes me sweaty. Sure there's a physical component to it that makes me sweat. But it shouldn't make me sweat that much. But somehow it does. If you ever ask me to work on you, be prepared for me to sweat all over you. But hey, that's a small price to pay for feeling better, right?

SCRATCHES AND DINGS
When I got my car more than a year ago, I was so excited. Even though the day was very cloudy and rainy, I could only see the beauty that came from my brand new car. I loved the way the five-pronged wheels looked while I was driving. I loved the sleek black look. I loved the leather interior. But it got to the point where I was overly protective of my car. I didn't want anybody wearing dirty clothes to sit in it. I didn't want to park anywhere close to anybody else. And I was always careful to wipe my car down after driving it.
But God helped me to realize that I was looking this material object a little too much. He helped me by giving me some gentle reminders. The first came when I had to make a U-turn on a very, very, very narrow street near Jeff Chen's place. It was so narrow, I ended up backing up slightly into a low blue wall that left multiple blue scrapes on my back bumper. I was devastated and slammed my fist down on my steering wheel in anger. The next incident occurred when someone else was driving and accidentally backed the car up in the CEFC back alley and grazed the tree by the steps that lead to the Ko's house. That left a minor scratch. And of course, I have the usual dings from having other people open their doors into my car.
But today, I got another gentle reminder when I was parking my car today in a very tight spot. I accidentally grazed the front right corner of my car against a cement post, leaving a very noticeable white scratch. I was so mad ... but quickly accepted my mistake.
I just hope I've learned my lesson now so that I won't have to be reminded anymore.

CHOCOLATE AT THE GYM
While I was working out today at the gym with Mark, I noticed a very curious-looking man who had a box full of See's candy. Now, I don't know about you, but I think most people aren't too excited about seeing a box of See's candy. Maybe it's just because they get passed around like fruit cakes during the Christmas season. Or maybe it's just because you always end up picking the very one that you don't want (for me, that's the coconut one or the nasty raspberry-filled one).
Anyway, this guy was apparently selling it as a fundraiser. And apparently, he was very proud of the charity he was raising money for because he literally went up to every person in the gym and asked if they would like to buy some See's candy. Now, I am not opposed to people selling candy for a fundraiser. Nor am I opposed to people coming up to you and asking if you want to buy some. But to go to a gym, where people are actively trying to avoid such foods while trying to lose weight, and push See's candy in their face is a bit much. But, of course, the guy had the last laugh because he sold his entire box.
And you wonder why more and more Americans are becoming obese.

DINNER WITH THE CHAMS
My family had dinner with Michael and his family Sunday night at Ocean Star. I don't know if you all know this but Michael's grandparents and friends with my grandparents, making his parents friends with my parents, and obviously, making Michael and me friends. I've known him since kindergarten (or maybe even before).
Anyway, the dinner went well. The parents talked about the usual - work, recent vacations, their health, some old stories, and all the while getting in a few "Michael should do this ..." or "I think Victor needs to do that ..." But more importantly than that, Michael and I had a chance to catch up. This was rare considering we already spent Friday night in Koinonia sharing and praying together. After getting a chance to share already this week, we usally wouldn't end up talking again for a while. But this dinner gave us that chance and I couoldn't have been happier about that.
See, the weird thing about me (and I think maybe him too) is that I would love it if I could just sit a person down and get to fire away a bunch of questions I've always wanted to know about them. And most of the time, they're non-conventional questions. I asked Michael everything from "Are you competitive?" to
"What do you do on Saturday nights" to "How much time is ideal for you to spend with a girlfriend?" Needless to say, it was a great time.
Afterward, the weirdest thing happened. As we were leaving, we bumped into Frank and his friend Dave. And as I was saying hi to him, we bumped into Danette and her cousin Michelle. I thought I might turn around again to find the rest of Koinonia behind me!

CABAZON
Since my cousin Allison needed to get new bedding for college and my other cousin Jonathan needed some nice clothes, my mom and I decided to take her (Jonathan couldn't make it) to Cabazon Saturday. My mom loves getting bedding from some store there because it's dirt cheap and the quality is good. And we were just hoping to find some good sales so we could expand Jonathan's wardrobe, which at this point in time consists soley of T-shirts and shorts. Seriously, the man owns only one pair of pants ... and they don't even fit him! Luckily for us, there was this huge Tommy Hilfiger sale so we loaded up on nice plaid shirts for him and two pairs of pants for him. We also ended up getting him some nicer shorts (read: not basketball shorts) from Gap too. Allison couldn't find any bedding she liked, but she did end up getting some nice new clothes from Quicksilver (or I guess it's called Roxy for the girls stuff).
As for me, I usually end up going crazy buying all kinds of things when I go to Cabazon, but I was much more controlled this time around. I had a $50 J.Crew gift card that I had been lugging around in my wallet since Christmas that I couldn't wait to use up. Luckily for me, there was this huge sale there so I wound up getting a pair of pants and a shirt for Karena.
But most importantly, we were able to use the time to talk about Allison's last-minute prom planning and her thoughts on summer school and her preparation for college. That conversation made the time (and money) well-spent.

NOSTALGIA
It seems like everyone is looking back to the past these days. Just look at all the TV specials coming out - The Cosby Show, American Bandstand, NBC and CBS both have anniversaries where they look back at all their shows. And for some reason or another, I find myself looking back at old pictures too.
Nostalgia is something I treasure. It's comfortable and familiar. And thoughts of the past really came rushing at me while watching Spider-man on opening day with Nathan, Jason, Debbie, and Julie. First off, I have to tangent and say that I always love watching big movies on opening day because the crowd has this electricity to it where people clap and cheer throught the whole movie. I love that! And you're probably wondering about the grade I'd give the movie, right? Well, I give it an A-. The dialogue was very cheesy, even by my standards. But I think Tobey Maguire did a great job playing the kind of dorky Peter Parker. And I like Kirsten Dunst so have her play her usual bubbly character was fine for me. And Willem Dafoe was great as the Green Goblin.
But I disgress. Let's get back to nostalgia. At the very end of the movie, as the credits are finishing up, they play the old "Spider-Man" theme song. Wow did that moment bring back memories!!! I thought back to those days I would watch the cartoon on Channel 11 after school, which got me thinking about other cartoons like Voltron and Robotech, which got me thinking about all the comic books I used to collect and still have ... somewhere, which got me thinking about my La Merced days, which got me thinking about teachers I had and girls I liked, which got me thinking about ... And the list went on and on and on.
I was a kid full of potential. Now that I'm 25 and looking back, I couldn't help but wonder if I had met that potential and done what God had intended me to do to the fullest of my abilities. I don't quite know the answers to that one, but I know one thing: Looking back allows me to know where I've been and that'll help dictate where I'm going.

PUSH OR PULL ... CONTINUED
Darn.
I knew it.
I should have pulled.

PUSH OR PULL
Every once in a while, I need to write an entry similar to the way Jason writes his (aka very vague). Here is today's:
Sometimes you push.
Sometimes you pull.
But all the while, you try hard to get it right.
Everytime.
But somtimes you pull when you were supposed to push.
Or you pushed when you were supposed to pull.
And that leaves YOU feeling pushed and pulled
In every direction.

SPIDER MAN
I was driving through Westwood when I passed the world premiere for the movie Spider-Man. It was such an amazing site to see because they had the red carpet rolled out and stars were no doubt on their way. I was hoping to catch a glimpse of the movie's stars like Tobey McGuire and Kirsten Dunst as well as the other stars who showed up including Will Smith. But I had no luck. The biggest star I saw were TV reports from Channel 9 and Shaun Robinson from Access Hollywood. But it still was cool - especially with the 50 foot Spider-Man crawling upside down from the Fox tower.
But that got me thinking about the real reason why I want to see that movie. I want a chance to see Nathan and Jason immortalized into Hollywood magic forever as extras in the movie. Hopefully, they can be seen.
I remember my neighbor was an extra in the Karate Kid II and was easily visible for a few seconds. But the best, of course, was Johnnie Tam's 10-15 second showing in Wayne's World II. That scene cracks me up everytime because he looks a little goofy standing there in front of Mike Myers and yet, you can't help but think how cool that is!
Hopefully Jason and Nathan will get to join those ranks!