Thoughts

QUICK THOUGHTS
1. Last Thursday was a big day for Karena's dad. He was finally transferred from out of the Skilled Nursing Facility and into an Acute Rehabilitation unit in Northridge. It's supposed to be one of the best ones where he'll get 3-6 hours of physical and occupational therapy a day. So, that's great for him. In fact, the therapists at the nursing facility are going to write up a case study since he is one of their best patients -- literally going from a guy who couldn't do anything for himself to being able to take several steps with a walker with minimal help.
Now that he's in Northridge, the problem becomes how we are going to visit him. It's roughly 25 miles away and takes K's mom 2 hours by bus to get there one-way. But we'll do the best we can to still visit him on a daily basis.
2. We went to a wedding yesterday for one of Karena's Cornell classmates. It was held in someone's EXTREMELY beautiful hilltop home near Griffith's Observatory. The reception was later held at the Glendale Hilton, literally down the street from us. It was great to see so many of her old friends fly out from New York to celebrate together.
The funniest moment of the evening was how the DJ could not get very many people out onto the dance floor. He tried hip hop. He tried slow songs. He even tried some oldies. Finally, he went with New Order's "Bizarre Love Triangle" and everybody poured onto the dance floor. It just goes to show that every Chinese 20-30 something loves that song!
3. One of the nicest things anybody has ever done for me happened today: Judy got me an autographed book by John Wooden on Leadership from UCLA's Festival of Books. I was so surprised and so touched, I was left speechless. Thanks Judy!
4. By far, the best news I gotten in a very, long time: My sister and Gabe are expecting! Check it out. Congrats to you both! I'm excited to finally be an uncle!

GOOD DAYS/BAD DAYS
One thing I mentioned a few weeks ago is that I'm really learning about how you have to experience the lows so that you can really appreciate the highs. That's why you favorite team has to lose games. That's why we all have to endure some bad days.
This past Wednesday was probably one of the worst days I've ever had at work. We were completely short-staffed and yet we were bombarded with so many demands from everybody, we could barely managed. My under shirt was soaked through with sweat and I was furious. And as I mentioned in my last blog, I had to deal with the accreditation people too (JCAHO).
Well, despite all the bad that happened that day, we managed to make it through by God's grace. And it turns out that I did a really good job with the accreditation people, according to my boss. They said some pretty good things about me and our department. That seemed to make all the stress worth it.
I experienced the lows. And now I can truly appreciate the highs.

SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT
I was really hoping for a good day today at work since it's our anniversary, but I had no such luck.
After having by far the busiest day ever at work in which I saw a record number of outpatients and hospital patients, I was also grilled by the hospital accreditation people (JCAHO) twice. But everything worked out well and my boss was pleased with my performance. Thank God!
But what I was most disturbed by was when I was closing down the department just minutes before 6pm (closing time). I turned off the TV and the patient says, "Hey, what are you doing? Why did you do that?
"Ma'am, we're closed."
"What time do you close?"
"6 o'clock."
"Well, it's only 5:55."
"I'm sorry, ma'am, we're all gone by 6 o'clock so I have to close up now."
It bothered me that she had such a sense of entitlement as to even question when I should close up the department. After the crazy day I had, I was in no mood to deal with her.
So, I turned off the TV and walked away.

VACATION-ITIS?
Everybody has heard of senioritis. I had a bad case of it in high school when I didn't care much about my schoolwork during the second semester of my senior year. After all, as long as I passed my AP tests, I was set. The colleges were barely even going to see those grades. So, needless to say, the second half of my senior year was one of the most fun times of my life. (And I even passed the 3 AP tests I took that year!)
Now, since we're looking forward to an upcoming vacation, Karena says she's got Vacation-itis. She doesn't want to do any more work and feels that the work days have been dragging longer than usual. She simply can't wait to be on vacation.
If vacation-itis is a illness, I think I'm coming down with it too!

SEASON OF LIFE
While visiting my friends Mark and Gina on Friday to see their newborn baby girl, we began to talk about life.
We all decided that despite all the joys of marriage and children (for them anyway), it's still a terrible season of life. It's really hard to see your parents and grandparents get older -- having their bodies start to break down and/or to see them pass on. Both Mark and I had experienced a family loss recently.
But, like it or not, time continues to move and we're moving into the roles our parents once filled and they are now filling the roles our grandparents filled. It's the circle of life, I guess.
Still, it's a very painful season.

COMPUTER HELP
I had two strange things happen to my computer. Can anybody help?
(1) After typing in a URL in my address bar and hitting enter, nothing happens. Instead, I have to use the drop bar for addresses I've used previously to get to a webpage. If I want to go one I haven't visited before, I have to use yahoo or google to get there.
(2) My font suddenly went to a big one where all my icons and font sizes are huge. I didn't change any of my preferences. It just did it on its own yesterday.

If you can help, please write a comment. Thanks!

BREATHE RIGHT
I recently purchased some Breathe Right strips from Costco in an attempt to get a better night's sleep and to decrease my snoring.
And although I was really impressed by how much better I can breathe with it on, it still didn't stop my snoring, according to Karena.
Most nights, she has to turn the TV up louder to hear since I'm snoring so loudly. I was really hoping that the Breathe Right strips would at least make me a little more quieter.
And I'm not sure yet whether I feel more well-rested since wearing it. It's only been a few nights, but I was hoping for an immediate change. I guess I shouldn't hope for instant gratification.
Still, I'll use the rest of the box and report my findings later.

WHAT I SAID
My grandfather passed away this morning around 6:30am. Since he had suffered multiple organ failure, he was struggling towards the end. But once he passed, my mom said he looked VERY peaceful and even appeared to have a smile. All his children were by his side.
Karena and I went to visit him last night and were able to say a few final words to him. And even though he was unable to respond, we still spoke to him like normal.
I didn't know what I was going to say, but here was a brief summary:
"I was just telling mom about the good laugh we had a few weeks ago when you were still on the 5th floor of the hospital before your surgery. Raymond used to find you during school while you were there learning English. You used to always steal him a few grapes from the snack table and he was always thankful. Can you believe that was nearly 25 years ago now?
I still remember how you always brought us food, kept us laughing, gave us massages, let us watch Dumbo over and over and over. You were always fun to be with and always had a smile on your face.
And you've always been so nice to Karena, giving her gifts and saying nice things about her.
And now, we're happy to hear that you have been baptized and believed in God. So, don't be afraid. You'll soon be with Jesus.
We love you very much."
And with that, I kissed him on the forehead.

iPOD MUSIC
I have to admit that I love having so much music on my iPod. Some people wonder how anybody could fill 30GB, but it's been easy for me (I'm at 17MB already). During our last trip to Las Vegas, I was able to impress Enoch with some of his old favorites (Voices That Care, Another Bad Creation, The Top Gun Theme) and Steven ('90s favorites like The Smiths and Rico Suave and Vanilla Ice) and Liz (with Paula Abdul and Janet Jackson) and Karena (with her new fav James Blunt).
I love music and love having access to so much of it. And it's fun to be able to impress people with the various songs I have.
Recently, Enoch called me to ask if I had some obscure ones: Brenda K Starr's "I Still Believe", Belinda Carlisle's "Circle in the Sand" and Stacy Q's "Two of Hearts." I was glad to report that I had them all.
Hmm, I hope this doesn't just mean I'm nerdy.

LIFE'S TOUGH ON EASTER
Boy, this blog has sure been a downer lately. I've really been learning what it means to have joy in my heart in the midst of tough times. On the one hand, I'm excited that it's Easter and that I am able to say He is risen!
But on the other hand, my grandfather's condition has worsened. He's completely swollen all over and more jaundiced. His liver and kidney function is declining and there's little anybody can do about that. Even our celebration for Raymond's 35th birthday last night was subdued because of the circumstances.
And this morning, we awoke to yet another hit on our house. (By the way, this is the fourth time somebody has hit some area of our house with their car.) Somebody drove up our front plantar and ran over all our ground covering and knocked our sprinkler system out of place so that it began leaking large amounts of water. We've since had to turn off our water and hopefully have our handyman come out as soon as possible.
Still, we're trying to be hopeful in all aspects.

GOOD FRIDAY
I have to admit that with everything going on these days, Good Friday kind of snuck up on us this year. Still, the events of the last week and the last few months have really helped to deepen my faith and taught me new things about the Christian life and our lives here on earth:
(1) I prayed in Mandarin for the first time ever the other night. I held my grandfather's hand and said things that probably didn't make sense (I'm really out of practice), but I figure God already knows what I'm trying to say.
(2) It was great to have Darian's mom Irene Ng be my grandfather's nurse when we visited Thursday morning. She took extra special care of him.
(3) Overall, his lab work has been showing some improvement in his liver and kidney function. He's also off the ventiator, but is still intubated. He also is still sleeping most of the day but does open his eyes ever so briefly.
(4) We still pray with Karena's dad every night before we leave. He's getting stronger and will be preparing for a transfer to a higher level Acute Rehab facility in Northridge soon.
(5) I'd be lying if I said all this wasn't hard on the two of us. But I'm working on trying to have better communication and better quality time with Karena so that our marriage won't suffer.
(6) Through it all, I have to say that I'm truly thankful and feel that God has provided abundantly and has done some great things. Thanks for your prayers and your genuine "how are you's". They've meant the world to us.
(7) This Good Friday will be different than any other, and yet somehow, I feel more appreciative and generate more power from Christ's crucifixation than ever. He died for me, I'll live for Him.

MCDONALD'S GOOD DEAL
Karena had some coupons for buy 1, get one free McDonald's breakfast sandwiches that expired today. So, we got up a little earlier to go to the drive-thru. After telling them we had two coupons, we pulled up to the first window to pay.
But Karena couldn't find her other coupon so she asked to cancel one of the two orders. So, we ended up paying $2.50. But when we pulled up to the second window to pick up the food, the lady gave us 4 sandwiches. After we told her we cancelled one of the orders, she just said, "I already made them so you might as well take them. There's nothing I can do about it now."
So, we got 4 sandwiches for the price of one! It was a good morning.

GRANDFATHER UPDATE (PART III)
Below is an excerpt from an email I received from my mom on Saturday morning. Since then, my grandfather's condition has been unchanged. Please continue to pray for the physical, spiritual, and mental health of my grandfather and my family.

Wai Gong's condition is not good. What meant to be a small hernia
procedure turned out to be a major colon surgery. About 8" of his colon
was removed along with the hernia. He was asleep the whole time last night
right after the surgery. I was told that his risk of complication was high
because he is 85 and has heart desease and is very weak.

This morning as soon as I went to the special care unit where he
stays, the nurse told me that he was very sick. Then every nurse and
doctor who came into the room told me the same thing He was unconscious
the whole time. His heart beat was super high yesterday at 140.
Today, his heart beat is super low in the 40's. His blood
pressure is so low (60 over 40) that they had to stop some medication. His
blood is also very thin and they have to give him something to make the blood
thicker. Both of his arms were poked and filled with holes and bruises
from the needles. He could not talk because of the oxygen tube taped
tightly around his mouth and face. There is another tube to his stomach
from his nose. They put special sleeves over both arms and legs to restrict
his movements to stop him from pulling the tubes out of his mouth, nose and
between his legs. He has a tube and a bag between his
legs.
His kidney is failing also. The doctor performed a procedure and
installed a special tube with 3 ports in his lower abdomen right above his
right thigh for medication and also for dialysis in case he needs. (They now say
he will need to start dialysis as soon as Tuesday). He just laid
there, not moving and seemed to be unconscious. We could not wake him
up.
Then, all of a sudden he opened his eyes. He face turned red, his
eyes looked watery as if he was crying and he tried to talk. He looked as if he
wanted to get up. Both Jojo and I rushed over to him, and we hold his
hands. He held our hand very tight and tried to talk to us and embraced
us. Then the nurse came in and put him back to bed because he was not
supposed to move. Then he became unconscious again.
His new tube with 3 ports started bleeding because of this commotion.
The nurse chased us out to lunch so she can clean him and changed his
wet sheet and bloody gown. While we were on the way back, the hospital
called my cell and wanted us to go back right away because wai-gong turned
purple and had no response at all. We got back but we could not get any
response from him either.
Pastor Pak-Fai Chan came. Strange thing happened. As soon as we
announced to his ears that Pastor Chan was there and the pastor touched him, he
opened his eyes and acted as if he wanted to cry, talk and get up. Pastor
Chan asked him if he had faith in god, and if he did, squeezed his hand.
There upon, Wai-Gong squeezed his hand. Then the nurse came in and did all
sort of things to him because he was awake finally. Then he passed out
again. Pastor Chen, Bei Bei Ah Yee & auntie Emily (shiu ah
yee) and me prayed by his bedside with him unconscious.

GRANDFATHER UPDATE
Thanks for your prayers. He had surgery yesterday where they addressed his hernia and removed 6 feet of his colon because of his infection. We went to visit him last night and he was still sedated and breathing with the assistance of a ventilator.
Your prayers for his health and the spiritiual and mental health of our family would still be greatly appreciated.

GRANDFATHER UPDATE
He is going to have hernia surgery this afternoon, Thursday, at 2pm. The surgeon may remove a portion of his colon if he can reach it and/or if it's necessary.
After that, the doctors think he'll need to stay another week in the hospital before being transferred skilled nursing facility for physical therapy. That stay will probably lasta couple of weeks. The duration depends on what is removed during today's surgery and also how quickly he recuperates.
As in any surgery, there is a risk and a potential for complications. His risk is higher than most because of his heart condition and age.
Please continue to pray for him and my family, if you get a chance.
(P.S. Thanks to Jesse and CEFC prayer-ers for praying for him during last night's Prayer Meeting. It is greatly appreciated!)

123456
Today, at 1:02 AM and three seconds, the time and date were:

01:02::03 04/05/06

How weird is that?

A TERRIBLE DAY
Yesterday proved to be one of my worst days of late. First, I reported to jury duty in downtown with the hopes of only having to stay the one day since I had a huge caseload of patients anxiously awaiting my return. But unfortunately, I got put on a panel and am already sitting in the jury. I brought so much reading material that I wanted to finish and didn't get to read much at all. Plus, I was excited to get to use my iPod in earnest for once . . . and didn't get to do much of that either.
And of course, the attorneys couldn't meet for the afternoon so afterwards, I called my boss to let them know I'd be out at least until tomorrow or maybe even the whole week. That got them nervous and they asked if I could come in to work for the rest of the afternoon. I was so shocked by the question that I fumbled a "yes."
Stupid me.
Next thing I know, I'm working and have all my plans to visit Karena's dad and my grandfather before watching the UCLA/Florida game completely derailed. Plus, my dad might have needed a ride to pick up his car that was in the shop, but that got messed up too.
I just should have said no. My fault.
Anyway, I ended up not seeing Karena's dad and went to watch the game at the Wais place. I was so heartbroken that I have been avoiding any sports broadcast. All I watched on ESPN was 5 minutes of Baseball Tonight. But I even had to turn that off when I saw the ticker on the bottom report the final score of the UCLA game again. The refs made some bad calls and UCLA played tentatively and let the Gators dunk and dunk . . . and dunk. That's all I can say about it without getting emotional.
Let's hope today is a better day.

PRAYER REQUEST
Please say a quick prayer for my grandfather, who entered the ER Saturday night with severe abdominal pain. He has a cyst near his kidney or liver, intestinal inflammation, air bubbles in his stomach from an unknown origin, and a gall stone. Obviously, he's in a great deal of pain.
Plus, since he does not speak English, we must have somebody with him around the clock so please pray for my family as well.
Thanks.